{#sol15} perception 20/31

The March Slice of Life Story Challenge

hosted at the Two Writing Teachers

Join us for a month of writing!

Last night after dinner, we all just wanted to relax and have a movie night.

M. was not having it. She's my busy body and wants to be doing and going and moving.

"How about .... we go for a bike ride?" She suggested with a smile and a laugh because she didn't think we would go for it.

"That sounds like a great idea! Let's just hop on the bikes, go around the block for a quick ride, and then relax!" I agreed.

She gave me a surprised look, and then Daddy and P. quickly agreed as well. We were out the door in minutes and then second guessed our decision. It was a bit colder than we expected, but we agreed to get some fresh air and a little movement.

We rode around the big block by our house that goes all the way around the village hall and community center building. As we were passing the front of the building, there were some younger middle school girls out front, probably waiting for a ride.

Daddy and P. were in front of us and I heard the girls say something to each other that I couldn't quite decipher, pointed and then they laughed.

M. and I rode by and there was more laughing. I turned my ear their way wondering what might be said next. There were more words. I couldn't understand, but it was definitely about us.

My only guess is that they liked our cool trail-a-bikes or thought the girls looked cute. That's what we usually hear when we are out and about. I wasn't going to make it a big deal in my mind because I wouldn't have done anything about it anyway ...

... until not even five seconds later I heard, "Mommy? I think those girls laughed at me. Why did they laugh at me?"

My heart. just. broke. My busy body girl is also sensitive.

"Oh, no, honey, they weren't laughing at you. I heard them laughing too and I think they just really liked our bikes and thought you guys looked cute riding on them." I wanted to validate her feelings and her perception of the situation. But I held my breath.

"Oh. I heard them laughing and looking ..."

As a mother, I had not experienced that feeling before of my almost five year old daughter feeling self-conscious or inadequate or different. Or just being laughed at without knowing why.

I'm going to need to build up my repertoire of responses because one day it will happen for real. One day her feelings will be hurt and I need her to know to be strong and know who she is.

I just wasn't ready for it yet ...

{40 reasons} #sol15

Slice of Life hosted at the Two Writing Teachers Join in and share a slice of your life. _____________________________________________________ Today my husband celebrates a big, BIG birthday -- and I'm so lucky and thankful to have spent the last sixteen years learning about everything that he loves the last (almost) twelve years learning about everything that I love about him the last (almost) five years learning with my daughters why we love our Daddy. Created at canva.com _____________________________________________________ Happy, happy 40th birthday Jon!

{#sol15} 10 Tips for the Challenge

Slice of Life hosted at the Two Writing Teachers Join in and share a slice of your life. Last Saturday morning, I didn't need to wake up early. I wanted to go back to sleep. But instead my brain was awake and thinking. Creating this list. Writing this post. Many of us are embarking on an adventure - the Slice of Life Story Challenge. Writing, sharing, and commenting for thirty-one days in March. Want to learn more about the SOLSC? Check out Stacey's post {HERE} about the challenge hosted by the "Fab Six" over at the Two Writing Teachers ' blog. I hope you find these tips for the challenge helpful whether you are a first-time slicer (cue confetti!) or a year five slicer like me. 1. Before the challenge

{#sol15} deeper than beauty 8/31

The March Slice of Life Story Challenge hosted at the Two Writing Teachers Join us for a month of writing! I have twin four and a half -- almost five! -- year old daughters. I try to be consciously aware of what I say and do in regards to my body image and self-esteem and also with their body image and self-esteem. First of all, because I don't want them to believe everything that society says is true. Even if they don't fully understand it today. In addition, because they are fraternal twin sisters, I want them to understand they are individuals with unique and different bodies that God created for each of them. However, society -- including my loving family and friends -- tell a different story and harmlessly create a comparison war. My girls constantly hear how beautiful, adorable, cute, fill-in-the-blank with any other

Sonja March 20, 2015 at 7:46 AM
hard stuff sometimes, this mama gig. we have hit the stage where it has happened for real and it breaks your heart, even as your binding hers up.
JudyMarch 20, 2015 at 8:00 AM
Those words and looks that make us all feel inadequate and feeling hurt, but the constant building up and encouragement will bolster their (and our) confidence. Mothering isn't easy and there are no pat answers, but with God's help He'll give us the words to say. Hugs, Mom
LynnMarch 20, 2015 at 8:14 AM
My hair was standing at the back of my neck reading and anticipating exactly what happened! My first reaction is to get off the bike and "nicely" tell the girls how rude they are...but you did exactly the right thing, knowing you didn't have the exact words. Young girls can be so mean and I hope your girls never have to deal with that. But as we both know not realistic, but knowing you, you will find the words. xoxo
Thinking Made VisibleMarch 20, 2015 at 8:18 AM
One of the hardest lessons we all have to learn is, it's a cruel and beautiful world. I'm sorry your sweet little one is having to experience this at such a young age. Mean people (especially catty middle school girls) criticize more than they contribute, and our job as parents isn't to protect our kids from heartache, but instead teach them to be light in a sometimes cloudy world.
Terje March 20, 2015 at 11:53 AM
I read and my mom heart ached. Love and talking will help to build the armor.
JessieMarch 20, 2015 at 1:57 PM
This made my heart hurt. Just wrap her in love.
CarolMarch 20, 2015 at 8:53 PM
I hate these kind of parenting moments. There are never the right words when people you love are sad or hurting.
Amanda VillagómezMarch 20, 2015 at 9:00 PM
I'm so glad that you were spontaneous and surprised your daughter by agreeing (and getting fresh air). I am sorry about the middle school girls. Situations like that are so hard because you never know for sure whether it is well-intended or not. I think you responded just right. Your convictions to think about a perspective of strength in self are an inspiration for me as a mom.
KarenMarch 20, 2015 at 10:31 PM
My first thoughts are of my own daughters - both teenagers. They would have been the girls saying "Look! How cute!" Or something similar. I know it in my heart. I hope my heart is right! As a mom, you will always find the words. Moms always do! Think of your own mom...
LoraleeMarch 21, 2015 at 9:15 PM
And in these moments she will learn how she can always talk to mom. <3

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