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{sols} hospital stay

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I want to remember ...

The last time I had to spend the night in the hospital was the day you and your sister were born.

Saturday night was date night for Momma and Daddy.  You and your sister visited the petting zoo with Nana and Papa.  And then you had some kind of allergic reaction. It started with itchy bumps on your arms and neck.

Then you took off your new sparkly purple sunglasses.  Your eye was almost swollen shut.

A quick call.  Zooming back home.  A switch in the driveway.  Speeding to the ER.

A fearful four year old.  Experiencing everything so new and unknown.  You were so brave.  It was frightening when all the nurses surrounded you.  Poking and prodding and pulling off your clothes.

I held you close to comfort you.  I tried to find the right words to explain everything going on around you.  I held your face and together we sang the "ABCs" and "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" when they gave you a shot in your leg and put the IV in your arm.  I tried to convince you that being at the hospital was a good thing and the doctors and nurses were there to help you.

We both had tears sliding down ... Drip.  Drip.  Drop.

"I want to go back home," you whispered over and over.

"I know, baby.  I know.  Soon we will," I whispered back squeezing you tighter.

And then we were told the swelling wasn't decreasing as drastically as hoped.

"You'll be sleeping over tonight.  You'll be able to go home tomorrow morning."

I walked beside your bed being pushed around corners and down long barren hospital white hallways until we arrived into the pediatric floor full of color and aquarium murals.

Your own room.  An extra bed.  A teddy bear left just for you.  We snuggled together to get comfortable.  We read books.  The nurses were finally done with their checklist and you closed your eyes near 11 pm.

Not me.  I watched you sleep.  I listened to the IV machine beep.  I opened my eyes every time the nurse tried to quietly enter the room.  I prayed.  I thought about all the other parents with children in the hospital.  I was thankful for our mild case of a puffy eye, even though it was frightening for you.  So many other families are waiting and watching their children suffer from cancer or something unknown.  I was thankful for one night in the hospital, not two, three, or even weeks or months.

I couldn't imagine more than a night because I watched you while you peacefully slept.  And thankfully you slept all night long.  And the swelling went down.

Then we had to wait.  And wait.  And wait for the doctor to give us the okay.

"I want to go home now," you pleaded.

And then we had to wait.  And wait.  And wait some more even after he gave us the okay.

Sixteen hours later and you were discharged with most of the swelling gone.   I want to remember how precious you are to us.  I want to remember how brave you were that night.  I want to remember your sweet, innocent, yet positive spirit.  You did your best even in a stressful, unknown situation.

I want to remember our unofficial date night together, even if it was a visit to the hospital.


Thanks to Liz Lamoreux for her writing inspiration and "I want to remember ..." writing idea.  Her thoughts:
"I want to remember..." is one of my favorite prompts to use here on my blog, in Project Life, and when I'm stuck (or when I think I don't have any stories left). Each statement becomes it's own access point to a story I want to tell. And, so often I find threads of gratitude woven within the memories. 


  1. You never understand until it happens to you. Even though your experience was "minor", you have a clearer understanding of what others are going thru. M was a trooper and I'm sure P was the same at home - wondering and wanting to be by Sissy. I'm so glad that it was only for one night and that she is improving. Prayers continue to be said to find out what caused it. Hugs to all. Love ya, Mom

  2. So powerful and beautiful... I want to remember produced magic here!

  3. Nice to hear everything was ok. Whew! What a date night! Thanks for sharing.

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  5. Your message hit home. We spent 14 nights in the ICU/hospital with our 21year old son. It never gets easier and I love how you reflected in your Slice. I am still processing but your blog helped me to continue to embrace our motherly journey. (Love spell check :)

  6. I'm glad everything turned out okay for your son. What a scary experience for both of you. Your writing so powerfully expresses the fear and gratitude you felt.

  7. I can only imagine how scary this was for you. But you drew us in so beautifully with your story. I'm happy all is well and you can all continue on with summer.

  8. The main thing is that it all ended well. Nothing is scarier than when a child is sick - one feels so helpless.

  9. So glad to hear that your child's allergies subsided...but what an unknown! You shared both the dreadfulness and the beauty of this surprise hospital visit. I love these two lines :
    "I want to go back home," you whispered over and over.

    "I know, baby. I know. Soon we will," I whispered back squeezing you tighter.
    You demonstrated great bravery for your little one!

  10. What a fright for all! This is a night to remember, but you've made it into a special memory of closeness in the family. Beautiful words!

  11. Scary to have one's child experience this. It seems you did okay, and she did, too. You shared this beautifully and poignantly, Michelle. So happy that all is well.

  12. I wrote about the 4th too. Your writing was so captivating and had me on the edge of my seat - my eyes scanning ahead to catch a glimpse of how things worked out. Thank you for your writing!!

  13. Holy cow! What a night! Glad everyone is ok! Beautiful writing!

  14. Oh no! What a scare for your family! I'm glad everything worked out well and relatively quickly. It's always eye-opening when you can put yourself in another persons shoes and realize how lucky you are. My friend's six-year-old is newly in remission from cancer and while she was undergoing treatment, their house burned and was a total loss. Not only did I find myself praying for her family but also thanking my lucky stars that my family's problems are pretty minor. We have so many things to be thankful for, don't we?

  15. I love how you wrote about it...the I want to remember...the dialogue...the word choices...

    The girls are going to cherish the words you write...for years and years and years...

    So thankful all is well.


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